Shameless cranky.

We went to the paed.

Ivy and I, on two hours sleep.

Ivy’s bottom was in the process of blistering up again and there was not a thing I could do to stop it.

Applying the creams does little, except make her scream out in pain. I do it anyway because at least I am doing something and no one can say I didn’t try.

Not like the ENT, who inferred that I was non compliant with her ear drops.


Why, with seven children at home, would I want to do that? Why would I do that to my girl, anyway?

I digress.

The paed;

Was late.

Tried to jolly me out of it when he had obviously not done anything to understand the diagnosis we had been handed down.

Had no answers. (That was okay, I didn’t expect that).

Had no plan.

Checked her out, weighed her (she’s lost again, after a gain in hospital), looked in her ear.

Her ear canal was clean (ner ne ner ENT (gee, that was mature Tiff)) but there was pus and gunk behind the middle ear, therefore the drops were keeping the infection at bay but not killing it. *SIGH* Nothing new there. Ivy can only take the Ciproxin drops for ten days then we will jump on the merry – go – round again.

Changed antibiotics.

Told me he would call all the specialists to co – ordinate her care and would get back to me.

I did not believe him.

I have lost faith in him.

I wasn’t nasty but I didn’t let him off this time.

Last time he said he would get back to us, he didn’t.

Last time he said he would see us in the hospital, he didn’t.

He didn’t help her.

Ivy doesn’t trust him anymore either.

That’s sad;

because she did, he was the only one who could get near her without her crying.

Not yesterday, though.

I paid the receptionist, who, tapping away on her keyboard, said she had had a mental blank. I told her our name.

“Oh, I knew that“, she said spitefully.

“I bet you did”. I replied (Deep breaths Tiff, deep breaths).

She looked up at me, ”Do you need another appointment”?

“We have one in two weeks, which the doctor said to keep but he said he would call us, whatever that means”. I seethed. (Calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean).

I didn’t say anything else. I didn’t need to and I couldn’t without letting loose.

I was just shamelessly cranky.

Time to up the crazy pills, me thinks…

postscript; He really is a very nice man. Just not very available when Ivy is acutely unwell